The Road Ahead Of Me-by Delina Hill-Brooker

Right now I see

A road ahead of me

With twists, bumps, sharp curves and wide turns

It goes up, it goes down

And of course it goes around

This is a road that I must walk down to grow & understand my very being

Some parts easy, some parts hard

Some parts have side routes that will bring me back scarred

My future and all those around me are involved

The mystery of Delina is what I plan to solve

I am young, but old in so many ways

I need to go back and recapture some of my younger days

Took on a lot of responsibility at the ripe young age of sixteen

And because of that there is a void in my being

How will I fill this void? The road ahead of me of course.

I can feel the separation of my spirits good and bad

I’m experiencing emotions and things I’ve never had

I have a vision of happiness down the line

Find myself looking in the mirror and suddenly feel like crying

The reasons I guess are anxiety and fear

Partial happiness and wonders about people I hold dear

My son, really the only other part of me

A strong, but fragile someone who’s future I cannot see

I don’t think I’d be that concerned if it were just my well being

But I have a precious gift, I just wasn’t ready for, but of course there’s a meaning

My heart wants to explore, adventure and conquer the world

But half my heart feels like it’s tangled and curled

Words cannot explain exactly how I feel

And when I’m blunt with myself my visions seem unreal

I know that early on my road will lead me astray

From my upbringing, beliefs and morals, so I pray

Excited but scared, happy yet sad, hungry not yet full because there’s so much more to me

What do I do to find it? I just want to be free.

Free of all worries, stresses and strain

Free of loneliness and living in vain

Free to explore, committed to be free

On this road ahead I will find the true me.

2/24/99 Age 21

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