True Forgiveness – Tyler Perry’s Interview on Oprah by Delina Hill-Brooker

I’m not sure if everyone had a chance to watch Tyler Perry’s interview on Oprah. He spoke of several instances of abuse towards him from physical beatings by his father, to sexual abuse from multiple adults both men and female. Because of his abuse and no outlet to tell and get the proper help as he grew older like a lot of sexually abused children he struggled with his sexuality. “I knew I liked women, but my body betrayed me when I was touched by a man” he told Oprah. Who wouldn’t be confused when your body is ‘responding’ to what is being done to you, but your mind hates every moment?

Tyler told a story of how his father beat him unmercifully one day and he couldn’t escape in his mind to a safe place he felt as if the child in him died that day.

About a year ago Tyler started speaking about his abuse from his father. His father said, “Maybe if I beat you one more time you would’ve turned out to be Obama.” I’ll be the first to admit that I was floored when he said that he takes care of his father. Even though he said that he was trying to honor his mother and father and said that he had forgiven him; my first thought was that his father still had some type of hold on him. To me taking care of his father on a monthly basis did not equal forgiveness. I understood that it was never about the money, because that’s nothing to Tyler, but it’s the principal of it all. I don’t think I could be my father’s soul care provider given the situation. I’m all for forgiveness and moving on. I speak about the process of forgiving my father for his sexual abuse in my story of the book Revealing & Healing: 3 Women’s Stories of Survival. Tyler does not speak to his father nor does he have any type of relationship with him. I guess I would feel a little differently if his father actually apologized and admitted to his wrong doing, but it doesn’t seem like that ever happened.

I called my sister who is also a minister ranting and raving, she always has a way of putting things into perspective for me. We are supposed to honor our mothers and fathers. If that’s what God placed on Tyler’s heart to do then that’s what he is supposed to do. That’s probably why he is so abundantly blessed now. I told her of how until I saw Tyler’s interview I THOUGHT I had forgiven my father, because even though I don’t wish anything against him, there’s no way I would be willing to take care of him in any capacity. She told me that I can’t compare my journey to his and I don’t have the means to take care of my father like that yet so right now its not an option. She reminded me that God provides everything we need even when we are not worthy. Even with all the wrong we do He still wakes us up every morning, the sun still shines every day, He still allows the rain to fall to provide for us. We are supposed to be like that. I can only hope and pray that not only will I be as financially successful as Tyler, but that if it is God’s will that I will be able to forgive and do for others in the way He wants me to.

Makes you think huh?

“The same strength it took for you to take it, is the same amount of strength that it takes to let it go.” – Tyler Perry

If you missed it here is a clip of part of the interview:

http://www.oprah.com/oprahshow/Tyler-Perry-Talks-About-Being-Abused-Video

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