Who In the Hell?…My Reflection Looking Back At Me by Delina Hill-Brooker

Before I begin, let me go ahead and apologize in advance for anyone who may be offended by this post. THIS POST is for me and about me. It’s never my intention to offend anyone EVER. Now that all of that is out of the way…let us begin.

Last week the family and I took a family picture to be included in our Christmas cards. Here I am, hair done, looking cute. When my Hubby showed me the pictures I was shocked when one of the faces on the picture I did NOT recognize. (MY OWN). The only thing that looked ANYTHING like me was my smile. Who in the hell is that, that came and invaded my space? Is THIS what people see when they look at me? This is not the image I’m trying to present to the world. Did I gain 20 pounds in the last two weeks or something? These are just a few of the thoughts that rapidly ran through my brain. (Not to mention I had just went to the doctor the week before and when she weighed me I wanted to annihilate the scale.) I even took pictures and videos of myself the next day and couldn’t see the same thing that I saw in the picture. Was it a small glimpse of the things to come if I don’t get my act together? Well I’m not, I CAN NOT let that happen.

Let me stop and be perfectly clear for a second. I’m really ok with not being the 105 pounds that I was in high school. I have no desire to return back to the stick figure that I once was. I actually enjoy having a few curves and my new found ‘junk in the trunk.’ BUT my trunk cannot be JUNKY get my drift? I try not  to get hung up on ‘weight’ because if you look at what ‘society’ says is a healthy weight for your height, age etc it is way skinnier than I would ever want to be. And while I have been maintaining my size 8 for the past 5 or 6 years, I don’t want to venture out to a bigger size EVER. I’m actually comfortable at an 8 if and only if my stomach, thighs and butt are what I perceive as ‘right.’

Now back in May I started my own little “Get Fit Kick” and I did REALLY good in the beginning. I even lost about 7 pounds, but due to life’s circumstances I fell off track and never got back on. Well hello Universe! I got the wake up call. I’m listening to my warning and I’m back on track! Even though I don’t plan on starting until the New Year; I don’t believe in New Year’s Resolutions, because tomorrow is not promised and if you feel THAT strongly about something then you should be like Nike and “Just Do It.” So right now I’m researching different ways OUTSIDE OF THE HOME that I know I can stick with long term to reach my goals as well as keep it up.

I have a image of me in my head that I know I can get to and maintain. I have goals that I am striving for even outside of the physical and I ALWAYS reach my goals. I know a lot of people do have issues with their weight, I’ve never had it and I don’t plan on starting so it’s time to nip this thing in the bud before it becomes a problem. Never in my life has it been my goal to let myself go or look like I let myself go. I love me, and for me to be the best me I can be I have to be in good physical and mental health. Most people don’t know this, but I DO want to be in an action movie karate choppin’ some bad guys head off or something really physical like that lol (Just putting that out there into existence) But I’ve got to get in shape now so when the opportunity comes I’ll be ready.

Since I’m an optimist I’ll end this on a positive note. This can be applied to you and your everyday life. It’s not really just about weight. If there is something in your life that you see about yourself that you don’t like, then it’s up to you to change it. It could be finances, attitude, relationships, anything. Be the best you that you want to be. Let’s put away the excuses and just find a way to make it happen. If it’s important enough to you, you’ll find a way. Now let me go and do some sit ups! 😀


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