Love or Family by Angenita Williams

I have no idea how I end up watching Maury. Maybe I need that sort of down time when I get off work. What disturbs me is that my daughter loves it. It’s drama. And she shakes her head at the stupidity of some of the guests. I mean, she’s thirteen and she can see when someone is being played. Why can’t grown people see it?

But this one particular episode, titled Is My Cousin My Baby’s Real Father?, caught my attention.

The main guests, a girl, Shavone, her boyfriend DJ, and her boyfriend’s cousin Mike, were on the show. Mike swore up and down the slept with Shavone, and could possibly be the father of Shavone’s daughter, Destiny. Mike stated that he and Shavone slept together once, and that Shavone took him out on a date. Shavone’s recollection of the events was that she bought him a cheeseburger from a fast food joint because he was broke and she felt sorry for him. Mike also tells the world that DJ, the boyfriend, cheated on Shavone, and in turn Shavone cheated on DJ with not only him, but other men in their family.

The DNA results proved that DJ was the father. There was a lie detector test done as well that proved that all of Mike’s accusations were false. Mike continued to belittle Shavone, and DJ did not stand up for her or stick up for her. And Shavone states, “After it was proven that he lied, you are going to sit there and let him say that to me? OK.”And this is where I have a problem.

Yes, DJ and Mike are family. Yes, family is supposed to stick together. BUT it was apparent that Mike was an intrusion on the relationship. It was apparent that some form of jealousy  brewed inside of Mike, and he did not want to see DJ happy; especially with Shavone. And DJ just sat there like he did not even respect Shavone. At what point do we tell family to kick rocks, and roll with the one we love? And at what point do we as women stop allowing men to treat us this way? It was in DJ’s face that his own blood, his own cousin flat out lied to him, and he was ok with that. But the woman who has his back, bore him a child, is basically a warm bed that he  obviously enjoys dogging out. Shavone stated earlier in the show that she was in love with him, even after all the stuff he’s done.

I would venture to say it’s time for DJ to grow up and be a man.

Now, I only know about these people what I saw in the few minutes they were on stage, and I’m so sure that there is more to their story. But from what I saw, Shavone was in love with a man who really didn’t love her. The world could see it, my thirteen year-old saw it, but Shavone was blinded by a perception of love. And DJ, by the perception of family.

Poor Destiny.

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