Archive for the ‘online dating’ Tag

Dating Woes by Angenita Williams

…I saw…him

My heart turned cartwheels as my eyes ascended his six-five, stocky body. He turned his head just as my eyes reached his chocolate face. My gaze grabbed him.

He stood over me. The brown in his eye gave a twinkle, his teeth gave a glow. His scent captured my mind and made me a little woozy. This is…him.

He grabbed my hand and interlocked our fingers. He backed up, pulling me with him. When we got to his decided upon destination, his arms wrapped around my waist just above my ass. He pulled me close and stared upon my face.

My eyes spoke for me.

He leaned into my ear, “So what’s your name? Whatever it is, I know it’s only an extension of your beauty. I know who you…what you are. I may not know what the others call you, but I know exactly who you are to me,” his sultry voice stated. I smiled.

“It’s…Angel,” I said as I lost my way in his eyes.

“Sent to me….”

“…Yes. I was.”

…Or at least that’s how I pictured it…And trust me, that has yet to happen.

I’ve been dating for a few months. Ok, maybe a month and a half. I am totally confused by this mess. I’ve met some men online, and of the four I actually talked to, only one seems remotely interested, and respectful of my time. For example, I met a guy, nice, chocolate, and tall – just how I like them. We had coffee, I enjoyed it. He called the next day and stated he had nothing to do. I asked if it was his way of asking me out. He then says, “Well, let me make sure and I’ll call you back.” Two hours later, and just like I figured, he called to say something came up. But, he told me to call him back later that evening. This was on a Saturday. I texted him that Tuesday. No response. The way I see it, if you are not sure about your plans, don’t call to insinuate that you will make some with me.

That felt back burner to me…and if you are willing to back burner me, just where do you think you are gonna go? LOL. Maybe I made too much out of it, but I think that being a priority, or a hint of priority, should be out the gate. Am I wrong?

And then, the glorious penis shots. (YES, I’m so serious, ladies. LOL.) Why? Can someone please tell me, what about me says that I’m ready to jump in bed with anyone after one week, or after I say hello?  I shake my head and wonder has it really gotten to the point where women are that desperate for a man’s attention that she will take any piece she can have of him? How does that go for women like me who would like a gentleman who’s honest, caring, and trustworthy without sex? Or at least before sex. Dang.

Once again, I feel like this is too much to handle, so, it’s time to take down the profiles, and quit. Again. It’s just too much hassle, bull shit, and games that I have no time to play. 

I vented to a male friend of mine. Although slightly amused, he saw my frustration, and suggested I read Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man by Steve Harvey. He said, “We really are simple creatures. The book may give you insight. Try it.”

I guess.

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Single, Woman, Thirty-Something by Angenita Williams-Childs

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So, it’s not a secret that I am single. Have been since I was married. (You’ll catch that in a minute.)

Legally single for almost two years, I tried dating here and there…only to come with the realization again that dating is really not my forte. More than dating, I hate being lied to and not just by someone else, but by myself as well. OK, I can admit it. I did lie to myself…more on that later…

So, I guess my dateless life has some “eye raising” going on. I guess I am the perpetually single.

But let’s not confuse things…single does not equal lonely and desperate.

I enjoy peace. I enjoy quiet. I enjoy not answering to someone. I enjoy my own company. BUT, sometimes, I would like to go out. I would like to have a date. Unfortunately, many men’s idea of a date is coming over to my place, or me coming over to theirs. I’m all for hanging out sometimes, but dang, first dates? Can I get a dinner, a movie, concert, comedy show…something different? No chivalry. Approach me like I’m a teen or something, and get mad when everything is on blast. For example, I am not a little girl because I refuse to have “relations” with you. That may work on a twenty-something – you know that whole-make-me-feel-guilty-cause-he-wants-to-but-I-don’t-and-give-in-to-the-pressure-cause-he-could-be-the-one-for-me-and-I-am-just-acting-really-silly-with-him-and-I-should-get-on-my-grown-woman-and-ok-I-will-only-to-find-no-respect-today-and-no-call-tomorrow.

I am a woman and expect to be treated as such. Is that too much?

Being single, thirty-something, and woman can be harsh. Men see you as desperate. Everybody that has a man thinks you want theirs. And you get hit with lines like, “Maybe you should get on Match.com. You are so busy that you don’t have time to really date.”

And that ain’t the half.

So, I decided I would try online dating sites, just to see. And as soon as I signed up, I lost interest.

Guess I’m just not quite ready. I mean weeding through bull **** takes time I don’t have. Dating isn’t fun, anyway. It’s frustrating because I always run into one track minds who want to scratch their itches with me and nothing more. Or those who want to be disrespectful.  Or those who are absolutely ludicrous to think that spitting game or their worldly possessions impress me. Like I’m supposed to be dreamy-eyed at promises made with lies…or better yet…

Yeah, I ain’t ready…(LOL)…

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